A Mother's Love

Just before 8am, I head to the gas station located 2 miles away. On the way there, I see a deer running in circles in a panic on the side of the road. I slowed down. Suddenly a large, black Great Dane came running up with a baby fawn in its mouth. The dog and momma deer were fighting. Momma deer was hollering and kicking the dog. I immediately put my car in reverse and started honking my horn and yelling out the window. When I got closer, I opened the door and stood beside the car, still honking and yelling. A woman in an SUV pulled up and saw what was going on, so she joined me in honking and yelling. (The dog was in attack-mode, so we were both scared to approach it.)

Then suddenly, a guy on a dirt bike came flying up going full speed. He slid the bike to stop on the grass, dropped it, and ran to kick the dog. The dog dropped the fawn and ran away, but it stayed nearby pacing and waiting for us to leave. We all knew that as soon as we left, the dog would come back. The fawn was bleeding badly and could not walk. So I stayed by the fawn, the guy circled around us about 5 feet out yelling at the dog to stay away, and the other woman went home to get a blanket. Once she returned, we wrapped the fawn up tightly, and she took it to the vet.

The poor momma deer stood just a few feet away from us, hollering for her baby. I think she knew we were trying to help because she didn’t try to approach us. She just watched. Even as we all went our separate ways, she just stood there…lost and scared. I wish there was a way for us to tell her that we were taking care of her little one. But they will likely never see each other again. The strength and the fight that momma deer was putting up for her baby was incredible. It truly shows a momma’s love to put her life in jeopardy to save her baby.

The whole encounter was absolutely surreal. It was like watching an amazing video tv show. I wish I had caught it on video with my cell phone, but I was in the middle of it so I didn’t even think about it until afterwards.

Geico

Like most people, I hate commercials. I mute them, change the channel, or just walk away. Well, I have to say that Geico has two commercials right now that make me laugh every time I see them. In fact, I went to bed last night, but my husband stayed up to finish watching the tv show. One of the commercials came on, and I started cracking up from the bedroom when I heard it. It makes my husband laugh to hear me laugh at something so stupid.

The first is with the Pillsbury Dough Boy, and that one reminds me of my sister. The second one features a camel, and it reminds me of my son. The commercial links are posted below. Good job Geico!!

 

Doc Visit

I posted the other day about my meds and the probs I've been having lately. So, I reluctantly went to the rheumatologist doc today. After a lengthy conversation explaining my recent symptoms and issues, the doc look concerned and said that it wasn't from the meds. He said it sounded like something else was going on, possible something serious. He took 8 tubes of blood and said they would get back to me with the results in a couple days. It may be something fairly simple like anemia or it could be something major.

Well, that was definitely not reassuring!! I tried to ask him what kind of "major" or "serious" are we talking about, but he didn't want to specify anything until he got the test results back. He seemed to have a possible idea or two, but he wouldn't vocalize them to me.

Soooo, the wait begins. Fingers crossed and prayers said for something simple and treatable! Oh, and I now have a new big nasty bruise from all the blood being drawn - right in the inner elbow area of my right arm. OOUCCHH!!!

Helpful or Hurtful

I've been on a certain medication for about 4 months to treat my rheumatoid arthritis. The benefits are great in that I am able to move, walk, and work with minimal pain and stiffness. The downfall is the side effects. Being a diabetic for most of my life makes me very susceptible to pretty much anything and everything, so taking a med that reduces my immune system to practically zip is not good.

Well, the last month has been horrible for side-effects. I have broken out in tiny itchy bumps that cover my arms, hands, fingers, knees, and feet. I also bruise at the tiniest little thing. I've always bruised very easily, but this is insane! I sat in a lawn chair for about an hour, and the result was a bruise down my spine about 8 inches long. Last weekend, I was reading and had my arm rested on the table. Yep, another big nasty bruise.

My husband and my dad have been telling me to quit taking the meds. They worry about my health. But unless you actually know how painful the RA flare-up is, that's easier said than done. Before I started this round of meds, I was only able to walk with a cane. I could barely work on the computer because I couldn't grip the mouse or type on the keyboard. As a photographer, these are things that I have to be able to do. So I spoke with my mom yesterday, and she convinced me to go back to the doc and talk to him about all this. I've also been really depressed, which is unusual for me, the happy-go-lucky person. But I have to admit that I am starting to agree...while the meds help, it's becoming not worth the side-effects. Six of one - half a dozen of the other.

Joint damage and swelling from RA before I started back on the meds.
Two middle toes bending away from each other and top of foot swollen, red, and splotchy.

Beginning of the itchy bumps. They actually scared my arms and hands.

Bruise on my right side, between armpit and hip. This came from sitting in a rocking chair.

Bruise on forearm from resting it on a table while reading for about an hour.

Incognito Proves Beneficial

So as I previously mentioned, I've been kinda incognito for the last week. It has been so peaceful and liberating to not be checking social media sites all the time. And the world went on without me there to watch over it, so I'm thinking I will keep this up for awhile! I have also stepped away from a few business things that were making me insanely stressed, and it too proved beneficial.

In the midst of all this, I realized that I never did something that I promised a dear friend of mine. A couple years ago, in Oct 2010, my friend Debra asked me for help. She had some old tin-type photos and an old book that she wanted to be put into digital form and restored. I was excited to do it, so I gladly accepted. Well, I never did anything with them. She wasn't in any big rush, but I don't think she expected it to take 2.5 years for me to start them. Lucky for me, she is a very patient and understanding friend.

The last couple days, I have begun the grueling process of getting them into digital form. The book wasn't any problem and took a mere 30 minutes to scan in properly. The fourteen tin-type photos, on the other hand, proved to be quite a challenge! Scanning them at various levels and settings did not produce the results I wanted or needed. Time for my trusty camera to help me. I flipped the center pole on my tripod so that I could aim the camera straight down. I set up a white marker board as the backdrop to lay each photo onto. After much trial-and-error, I turned the lights off in the room and opened the shades to gently illuminate the room without putting direct light onto the photo. Next came the painstaking task of finding the perfect camera settings of exposure and shutter speed. I needed to bring out details the naked eye could not see without over-exposing the image. (You have to understand these tin-types are over 100 years old and only about 2x3 inches in size.) After about 30 minutes of testing different settings, I was ready to shoot. But then another problem arose...the image was too dark for the camera to focus on anything. Sigh...back to work again. I spent another 45 minutes determining the perfect depth-of-field so that I could manually focus the lens for optimal results. I had to take 10-15 photos at different depths and focus settings, then remove the memory card, load the pics onto the computer, and determine the best of them. Then go back and readjust from there. Finally, after almost 3 hours of adjusting everything, I was ready to shoot! And wouldn't you know it, the battery in my camera remote died. Just perfect! With the shutter speed at just over 1" long, I had to use a remote to avoid camera shake. Add another hour to make a trip to the store and back for one little battery. Then, it was smooth sailing after that!

11 of the 14 tin-types laid out on the white marker board. And yes, they are actually this dark.

The image taken from my camera on the left, and after about 2 hours of restoring on the right.
I still have quite a bit of work to do on it, but it already looks a lot better! And it's sized for at least an 8x10 print.

I feel better now that I have actually started this project for my friend. With my new "step-away from the B.S." attitude and approach to life, I should be able to get these done for her within about two weeks. I am excited to see the results, and I hope she is happy with them too.

Facebook Love

So, I posted earlier today about deactivating my Facebook account on Sunday. I went in about an hour ago to briefly re-activate it, merely to let my clients, family, and close friends know that I'll be MIA for awhile. My decision to disable it was sudden with no forewarning, so I at least needed to post on my business page that I would be incognito for awhile. Of course, I posted my phone # and email address if anyone needed anything.

The outpouring of responses, concerns, and prayers is truly heartwarming. I wasn't expecting anything of the sort, but there they are. I also received numerous private messages and texts expressing their love and support of me. This is a very difficult time for me, but knowing that people still pray for me and care about my well-being lifts my heart.

Unconditional??

Sometimes, the people you love the most let you down. They hurt you, emotionally. The only reason they are able to do so is because you care about them. If you didn't care, you wouldn't be bothered by it all.

How can someone who loves you, someone in your own family, believe you are capable of horrible things? I don't mean horrible like murder or anything, more like lying and cheating, especially when everything you do is for your family and to make them happy. I thought your innermost family were the ones that were supposed to believe in you. They are supposed to be the ones that support you emotionally.

Absolutely everything that I do is for my family. I want them to be happy. I want them to be proud of me. I constantly make posts on my Facebook page (before I disabled it on Sunday) that are about my family...how much I love them, how I am excited to spend the day with them, even pics of us together. Anyone and everyone that knows me, knows how much my family means to me. I would NEVER do anything to hurt them or disappoint them.

Yet last Sunday, my world came crashing down around me. Not only one but the two closest family members believe and accuse me of doing bad things. There is absolutely no reason for them to do so, and their logic makes no sense. They even went so far as to make posts on my Facebook page about it, hence why I deleted the post and deactivated my page. I am absolutely mortified and hurt by their actions; I cannot even think straight.

I don't think that I will ever fully recover from this. Even if they realize their mistakes and apologize, I will never trust either of them like before. I will never have that sense of family or safety with my loved ones again. I will always worry when it will happen again. I will always wonder why and how they could believe such horrible things about me when I have done nothing but always be there for them and love them unconditionally.

How can the two closest people to me in the world believe that I am capable of such things? How could they so quickly and carelessly break my heart?